10 QUESTIONS TO ASK BEFORE YOU SAY YES

10 QUESTIONS TO ASK BEFORE YOU SAY YES

………………By Bishop Shin


People in love are always excited to be with their new found love. The endless joy and peace it brings. Most people forget that love and relationships are not always rosy. There is a phase in every new relationship I call the ‘the fog of love’.
The ‘fog of love’ of love is a period of peace, comfort, joy and endless love. It’s a time of living in a fantasy and in a world that only exists for you both. The period where all you two do is talk and have all the fun you can have. It’s also the time all the shortcomings of your partner are ignored and overlooked because you feel new and full of love. It’s the time we do some of the craziest things and try new things just for the fun of it.
Unfortunately, this period doesn’t last forever. In fact, it only lasts for a couple of months and that fog disappears. Then we come to reality. A lot of those wonderful relationships start failing at this stage. This is because the endless bliss is gone. The ‘world where everything is perfect’ is gone. Reality has set in and most people find out that they made a mistake or they can no longer get along as they used to in the past.
To survive this period, you need to be able to be able to answer these 10 questions confidently before you even say Yes to a proposal or a relationship. No matter how well you two get along, the fog of love will dissipate over time and reality will set in sooner or later so prepare for it.
1. AM I READY FOR THIS RELATIONSHIP? : Most people jump into relationships without much consideration. Ask yourself this question and be sure you answer it boldly before you enter into the relationship. The fact that some guy or guys are asking you out or want a relationship with you doesn’t mean you should jump into the boat with them. Are you prepared and ready for that journey?

2. WHY DO I WANT TO BE WITH HIM? : A few things attract us to a person. It could be their way of walking, talking, composure, stature or any other thing we find attractive about the person. It could be their profession, money or car. Whatever the reason or point of attraction is, it should never be something that can be lost. It should never be something that is solely mundane. Money, profession, cars, houses, stature and the rest can be lost. If the reason why you want to be with someone is because of these things, then you are not ready for the relationship. Take your time and search again.

3. WHY DOES HE WANT TO BE WITH ME? : As loving as it might seem from all the sweet talks a guy will give you, it is your duty to get to know why he wants to be with you. In my other article, I talked about some of the various reasons people have for entering into a relationship. Not everyone enters a relationship for the purpose of getting married. Find out why they chose you out of the others and ensure its not because of something that can be lost. Guys can easily propose to a lady with curves and big hips and buttocks. If that is why he wants you, then you know where you are headed.

4. CAN I TRUST HIM? : Love without trust is like a car without gas on a hill. It will appear to be on course but it will definitely stop when it gets to a level ground. Is the guy someone you know personally? What do people say about him? Is he trustworthy from his actions and ways of doing things? Be sure of this one first before you say Yes to any proposal.

5. WHAT ARE HIS VISION(S) IN LIFE? : Most people jump into relationships without evening knowing where the man is going. You can’t join a bus when you don’t know where it is going. It is imperative that you know what drives the man you want to be with forever. Knowing his visions and dreams will help you have a better understanding of what you are getting yourself into in the relationship. You may end up with more than you can handle and it won’t help any of you in the relationship.

6. DOES HIS VISION(S) AGREE WITH MINE? : Our visions and goals in life in one way or the other affects who we are and what we stand for in life. That being said, you can’t just get involved with just anyone. You need to know what drives them. What motivates them in life. You need to know where they are going. Just because there is a free bus outside doesn’t mean you should jump in. Know where you are going and look for someone going to the same place with you.

7. CAN I CARRY HIS VISION(S)? : Being with an established guy is the dream of many ladies. It makes life easier for them. Then again, such men carry big visions and plans. As a lady and a help meet, can you carry his visions? Can you endure when it’s time to endure? Can you be his muse and inspiration? Don’t just be happy that you finally have your ideal man. Can you handle him? Most ladies like public figures. Can you handle the pressure, keep your focus and build your man in the process. If you can’t, then you will be of no use to the man. Think about it.

8. DO WE SHARE ANY THING IN COMMON? : There is nothing more frustrating than being stranded in an unknown place with no one to help you. Couple that with people who can’t understand your language. It is really frustrating. The same way, it is very frustrating to be in a relationship with someone who doesn’t speak your language. You are talking about a business plan and he is talking about football. You are talking about church and he is talking about things that happened at the bar. If two people don’t have a common ground where they can communicate effectively and bond, then there’s no future for that relationship.

9. WHAT IS OUR DIFFERENCES? : Nevertheless, a relationship without variety will soon turn boring. Boring is bad for any relationship. Our differences enhances the relationship. It ensures that there is always something new to try out for the other person. He plays golf. It will be a great time for both of us to go golfing one weekend. He likes video games. You can join him to play. It’s not just going to be fun, it will also bring in a new kind of bond between you two. Our differences makes us unique and the relationship fun filled unless the differences are bad ones. Then you should steer clear off him.

10. CAN I BE WITH HIM FOREVER? : This is the last and most important question to ask yourself. After answering all the questions above, can you confidently say you can be together forever? We don’t marry to divorce later on. Forever is a long time to be sorry.


If you are able to answer all ten questions effectively and confidently, then you are good to go. If not, then take your time. Get all the answers you need before you say Yes to any relationship or marriage.